Sorry to necro, but two things might be useful for new players:
One, I really wouldn't worry about pulling small clumps of enemy ships onto your border worlds, unless they contain valuable captured structures. Turrets, and even command centers, are pretty cheap to rebuild, and the remains rebuilders will take care of it for you (except the command center), so you don't even have to redo your plans.
The other --- you don't have to engage all of a planet's defenders at once. Guards will only leave their post if a military ship (i.e., not a scout) comes near them. So even if there are 600 ships on the planet, if there are only 80 near the entry wormhole you only need to send in enough ships to overwhelm the 80. This is a big drawback to using raid starships, actually --- if you let them cruise all over a planet, they'll wind up stirring up lots of ships that would otherwise stay quiet until your main fleet gets there to crush them. I love raiders, but I think you want to save them for things where you can get a big advantage by taking them out early ---- for example, warp gates if you're gate-raiding, ion cannons and orbital mass drivers if you don't want to capture them, and data centers on worlds I don't want to capture. Of course, they're also great as support ships with the main fleet for doing things like taking out guardposts under shields.