On with the show! I've got the whole AAR written up but it's a bit long, so will post it in chunks.
---[Operation Getting To Know The Neighbors]---
I get settled into my homeworld with a quick unlock of Military Command Station II, Neinzul Enclave II, and Riots, along with some defensive odds and ends (can't remember exactly, think I opened up lightning turrets I and missile turrets Mk.II right off the bat). Initial plan is to grab Ops and Kali for a buffer zone, and depending on what I find nearby push the perimeter out to Choo to the east and possibly Oololon in the west, and either gobble up everything in between or pick the cherries and defang what I leave on the plate, and have a nice secure little bunker-chunk of the galaxy to work from. Looking over the map and counting the hops, I speculate that the two AI homeworlds are probably Iota Persei and either Raiden or Ras Elased, as those three are as far away from me as they can get while also having a decent gap between each other. While I get the initial fleet building I order the scouts out to Ops and Kali and beyond to check out the neighborhood.
Ops and Kali are nothing special in terms of metal and lack any capturables, but the wormhole arrangements are decent. Doesn't really matter as I need to grab them anyway to build a fence. Onward, scouts! Let's get a look at Choo, Markab, Thoth, Eztli, and Oololon. In one of my partial-run test games before this I had a Mark III planet one hop out, and a Mark IV about four out, so I know those horrid things can be surprisingly close to home and I want to make sure that doesn't happen agai-
Son of a &@)*%.
The report comes back from Choo. Mark III, with some flavor of non-nuclear Eye, a truckload of force fields from various sources, and the icing on the cake, a Translocator Command Post. Two doors down is a bloody subcommander! Fantastic. Never mind about making Choo a chokepoint then, with no capturables and meh resources this little ball of pain isn't going to be worth the headache. It does have a CoProc though -- snuggled up right by the command station of course. Markab next door was mostly uninteresting, though I think it had a Translocator Eye on it. One of those two did, I forget which. Time to check up on the data feed from the scouts to the west.
Oololon is kind of tasty, 7 metal, might be worth grabbing depending on what Eztli and maybe Thoth look like, keeping in mind all the dire warnings I've read about needing to keep AIP low, especially as this is my first serious game and I have disregarded about half of the recommended settings I've seen suggested on the boards for newbies whose RTS skills are rusty. (Another +1 AIP again? 1 per 5 min seems really aggressive... but that's what the tooltip said...) Now, what about Eztli...
Eztli is a beautiful present placed in a box full of radioactive scorpions, resting in the middle of a bear trap. There is a ZPG! I want! There's a CSG on here too, which I need. There are also two Ion Cannons (Mk.IV and Mk. II or III) and other assorted nastiness. Do not want! Did I mention it's a Mk.IV planet? Yeah, it's Mk.IV, so all of said nastiness is sleek, gleaming, and cutting edge, making my fleet look at its model numbers and suffer crippling pangs of inadequacy. Damn, ok, so what about Thoth? Surely there's some way out of this corner of the galaxy that doesn't require me kicking down an electrified blast door surrounded by eels...
...
You have got to be joking.
Thoth polishes its shiny Mk.IV badge and smiles at me smugly over its CSG. No skipping this one even if I was willing to let a Mk.IV stay on alert the whole game. Blergh.
I review the map. The two easy planets I *need* for a buffer will alert a Mk.III planet and not one but TWO Mk.IVs. It's about 10 minutes into the game. Assuming an average game time of about 10-15 hours on the clock, minus say 20 minutes, is all that high-tier mess being on alert for way the hell too long. Visions of Mk.IV threat pouring over my borders all day long dance in front of my eyes. I take a sip of my drink and curse several times with great sincerity. I consider deleting this attempt and starting a new round of Aggressive Stupidity. I look at those horrible planets mocking me, and at that beautiful ZPG.
Balls to it, I named this save Aggressive Stupidity for a REASON.
I quickly grab Kali and then Ops and suck the knowledge out of them post-haste. I'm going to ignore Choo, I'm gambling that I can get away with ignoring that one on alert the whole game, but Eztli and Thoth have to go, and fast. And for that, I am going to need starships, lots of starships, because I already determined that low-tier fleetships disappear like tears in the rain in the face of Mark IV hostiles. Especially when Ion Cannons are in play.
I will also need warheads. I order the engineering crew to get to work on that Missile Silo ASAP.
---[Operation Opening Salvo]---
>> "Uh, Major General Pickett, Dr. Carroll, the AI just put in a build order for several warheads. We're going to need your authorization on that for obvious reasons..." said Chief Engineer Ivanovsky.
>> The Major General gave his science lead a look that could have roughly been translated into "I TOLD YOU SO IT IS GOING TO KILL US ALL" but instead he said merely, "Oh really? Doctor, I hope you have an explanation for this behavior of its."
>> "Of course I do! I'm sure it's perfectly safe and part of a very logical risk/reward analysis and it has no intention of using those on us."
>> <space crickets>
>> "I'll ask it for logs on how it decided this." She stepped over to the command terminal they had reserved for authorized personnel to communicate with the AI. "Red Queen, you have made an unauthorized request for highly dangerous ordinance of a kind you have not been cleared to deploy. Furthermore, we are in no immediate danger that would warrant such things even if you were permitted to use them and it's... raising the human population's anxiety levels unacceptably. Logs, or you don't get them."
>> The AI's synthesized voice buzzed over the comm speaker in the office as a flood of complex logic and statistics flashed across the screen. "Scouting data shows the forces at my disposal (inadequate forces, I require more starships immediately) will have an effect on the enemy that would be accurately classed as 'imperceptible'. A search of available human technology (quality is poor, existing human science teams are insufficient, requesting direct control of R&D resources)-"
>> "Request for R&D control denied," interrupted the Major General.
>> "Denial of request noted, reevaluation of the chances of human survival in light of that adjusted to .002 percent from .003 percent," the machine responded without missing a beat. "Returning to original question, concise summary of my decisionmaking process is thus -- I need a hammer to break down a brick wall, not a featherduster. Speed is also important as said brick wall is adding cannons as time passes."
>> "And you are definitely going to use those warheads on the forces on Thoth and Eztli? Not us?"
>> "Unwarranted paranoia. Psychological counseling strongly recommended to ameliorate that defect. Provide warheads now, Lightning and EMP class."
>> Major General Pickett grit his teeth and muttered something unprintable. He tapped in his command codes. "Fine, a one-time authorization for the LIMITED use of warheads granted."
>> "Of course."
>> "Hey I only punched in my auth code for the warheads, why is the starship factory going to work on new Heavy Bombers, Plasma Siege, and Neinzul ships? Infrastructure's not ready for that yet, son of a-<static>"
And so, about 30 minutes into the game, I EMP'ed Thoth and Eztli and blitzed them with my starship fleet, and bombed the Special Forces when they showed up to the party after luring them to the wormhole. There was also some wormhole hit and run/repair shenanigans in here. Clouds of Neinzul drones trailing fleeing Enclaves as the dart through wormholes is hilarious.
I quickly colonize my new prizes and smother that shiny new ZPG in defenses. With what is shaping up to be a starship-heavy approach I am going to need all the power I can get. My power grid thanks me profusely, my human crews can finally turn their coffeemakers back on.
---[Operation Mitnick]---
Um, AIP is almost- <auto AIP tick> - is 100 already? Joy. Well, it is what it is and at least I got plenty of bang for my buck. Whatever, I'll just have to find those DCs and CoProcs soon. I send my horde of ravenous science vessels into my new territory and resume scouting.
Apophis is boring, ignore. Dionysos has a Mark 5 Fighter fab, cool but from my couple of warmup tests before this I'm not crazy about fighters. They die so fast if the AI so much as gives them a stern look, and it is very good at those. I move on to Xiuhtecuhtli, which is also boring. Some early waves show up and die somewhere in there, splattering themselves on Kali's brickwall. Then I peek at Luyten's Star. Oh my.
It has a Spire Railcluster fab, sweet! It also has a Planetary Armor Inhibiter! Not so sweet! There was also a CSG-C I think. I contemplate the outcome of the equation Armor Inhibitor + Very Expensive Starships. I don't like that math. Another EMP warhead rolls off the assembly line while I send my scout on to Arachne. Major General Pickett curses profusely at what is starting to look like a pattern of WMD usage.
Nice! A Mk.V Raider fab, and no scary defenses. MINE. Especially because I now have supply to Luyten, which I really wanted because did I mention it also had a Superterminal? I'm rather paranoid about STs after my first encounter with it in one of my warmups, where I learned that the ST comes online the minute the planet changes ownership and does NOT require a hacker nearly killed me. I blamed an intern for plugging in a stray unlabeled Ethernet cable. But this time, a turret + FF + armor inhibitor combo (plus warheads) should mean I could sit on the ST for some serious AIP reduction, which is good because that clock is still ticking away steadily. Why did I trust that tooltip...
So I park most of my fleet under the FF at the command station on Luyten, with a hit squad of Heavy Bombers and Raid starships on Arachne, camping the wormhole (will pop them out right next to the ST when I need to smash it), then sneak that EMP I build under cloaking cover through Xiuhtecuhtli (yes I ripped up the defenses earlier but left the warp gate for the moment to avoid the AIP, I pay for that later). Sling the EMP through into the laps of the unsuspecting AI ships and then charge my fleet in from Arachne in KILL ALL THE THINGS mode, bent on burning it down before that EMP wears off. I succeed and stare at my soon to be active shiny new railcluster fab... and the ST. I prep. I wonder how many and how big of warheads I should bring for this? I remember how scary the ST was last time. I park a cluster of Mk.IIIs in a location to intercept if (when) things get out of hand, and hide my fleet just on the other side of the Arachne wormhole so they can pop out and smash the ST safely when I need to pull the plug. Human anxiety levels spike again for some reason with all those warheads floating around. Odd.
I tell the Colony ship to set up shop after the mobile builders I tossed in earlier finish up and get ready for the coming madness.
I learn what "wild rolls" are. That is a LOT of ships. A lot of them are also Mk.III-IV. Crap. At least some of them are distracted by chewing on the FF over the armor inhibiter. PS I love having an armor inhibitor. The turrets go crazy like a certain scene in Aliens. I watch as the AIP ticks down steadily, waiting for my HAP to start declining so I know when I've hit the point where I'm about to go too far. MAN that is a lot of ships... Shots are starting to ping off the command station's FF and I just saw my HAP flicker, time to end this. I send the plug-pulling team through to ambush the swarm and let the magic smoke out of the ST. I also hover my finger over the shiny red button on those warheads...
And I don't push it, I manage to contain the mess without them, though that command station needs the dents (gaping holes) pounded out of its hull now and a chunk of my fleet needs rebuilding. Acceptable, especially for a solid net 25 points of AIP reduction.
---[End Transmission 2]---